Benjamin Hardy once wrote: ‘The quality of your life and the quality of your work is determined by the standards you have for yourself, and the standards of those around you.’ This applies to anyone who wants a successful career as a restaurant manager.

Your level of talent, potential, education, dedication and experience is irrelevant if you’re surrounded by people who are unable to help you reach your potential.

Whether you accept it, or not, your friends will affect your work ethic, long term goals, dedication to success, vocabulary, and understanding of ‘good’. If someone associates with liars, then their intolerance of lies will fade. If you hang out with partiers then you will start valuing the short term, more than the long term.

We see this in the workplace all the time. Someone is promoted to manager and promises their friends that things will stay the same. After a few months they stop hanging out with their old friends. They spend.

James Allen, ‘As a man thinketh, so he is. As he continues to think, so he remains.’

Level Up

If you want to become a manager then it is important to surround yourself with people who force you to level up. You may not feel comfortable at first. You may feel out of your league, and even unaccepted. Expect that you will have your feelings hurt. But if you can stick it out, let them mentor you, then you will reach levels that you never dreamed you could achieve.


Don’t expect to be accepted at first. Successful people stay away from people with bad attitudes. They avoid them like the plague. The problem is that if you have a negative attitude then you project that in everything you say, do, and how you do it.

‘The mediocre have a very narrow perception of reality, and in turn, their lives. They see things as they are and not how they can be.’ -Aditya Mehta

The problem is that the mediocre majority doesn’t want things to change. That includes not helping people succeed. In fact, the mediocre majority wants everyone to live a life they approve of.

Your success will be severely limited if you put more value in other people’s opinions than you do in reaching your own goals.

Here is a relevant example:

In the 1930’s, C.S. Lewis and J.R.R. Tolkien were unknown. They joined an exclusive writing group dubbed ‘The Inklings.’ Through relentless, harsh, feedback of their peers, Lewis and Tolkien’s writing began to reflect the much-higher quality of others. Their mentors shaped them into the authors of books that generations of people have come to love.

First Steps

The first step for a restaurant manager is to start a journey to recreate their image. Set goals and determine the best way to reach those goals. Don’t worry about getting rid of your friends, or finding new. Your current friends will become frustrated with your evolving attitude and leave. Others who never paid attention to you before will start talking to you.

Seek Support

A Restaurant Manager can find support in many areas. You may want to Volunteer, go back to school, join organizations, join networking groups, join social groups. What you are looking for is people who will ppositively encourage you to reach higher than you are now. They will challenge you without making it about them, or putting you down.

It is your responsibility to choose the people you want to work with. The higher your standards, the more opportunities you will have.


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